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Our Adoption Oath

7/3/2015

9 Comments

 
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On June 26 2015, my wife and I entered a courtroom to adopt 2 young kids. These beautiful siblings had faced the horrors of neglect and abuse. But this day was redemption.

After 2 years and 3 months as foster parents, we crossed the line. We committed ourselves to lifelong care and responsibility for 2 more lives. With 3 biological and 2 foster children in the seats next to us, the Judge asked if we were ready to embrace this sacred task: "Now Mr. Penley, can you please explain to the court why you believe it is in the best interests of the children to be placed in your family?" Here is our reply.

Our Adoption Oath, under Oath, before Judge Kennedy:

"Why is it 'in the children’s best interests' to be with us? That question is answered every morning when Bri and London race to my legs screaming “Daddy,” knowing my excitement for them is equal to their trust in me. When Bri tells us every week, “You are the best Mommy and Daddy ever,” we know where she belongs. When London says, “My name is London Penley,” we know where his identity is rooted.

Our connection didn’t happen easily or overnight. When Bri and London first entered our lives 2 ½ years ago, counseling and food hiding were the norm. Kicking and screaming from flashbacks, trembling in the corner, and deceptive survival tactics, all betrayed deep fear and brokenness. Therapists joined us in the battle against cyclical child neglect and abuse.

Our story with London and Bri is both beautiful and terrifying. It shouldn’t have to be this way. But in a world where one person’s irresponsibility becomes an 85% chance for a child to enter prison, we are doing what we must. We are doing what we believe in. We are giving our time, our money, our love, our wisdom, our lives to show Bri and London a different way.
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We follow Jesus’ way. He believed that people could be redeemed if you were willing to sacrifice everything, even your life. So we have taught, led, disciplined, praised, problem-solved, left work early, gotten up in the middle of the night, and bought that extra ticket. The constant daily sacrifices do not come easy. But the results are beautiful. Bravery has replaced timidity, healing has covered wounds, trust has pushed out fear, developmental delays have literally been erased from the chart.

A song our forefathers sang calls us to this task: “Father to the fatherless, defender of widows – this is God, who is set apart from all the rest. God sets the lonely in families” (Psalm 68:5-6). Brokenness can be replaced by beauty. Today Bri and London are forever ours. They get a new name, a new identity, a new family and a new future. Bri can know there are many more Mommy dance parties and Daddy Daughter Date nights to come. London can know the swimming, swinging and hiking will continue.

We stand ready to fully accept and fully love Bri and London into our forever family. In many ways today is more of a formality because they have already been our family for years. Just look at their names on mom’s necklace or peruse the pictures of our family memories around the house.

They say it takes a village to raise children… and it is true.  I am so thankful for the community of friends and family that have journeyed with us, supported and prayed for us…. many who are here and many more we will see tonight!  THANK YOU! The journey has just begun."

Our New Family
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These may be the most powerful words I have ever said in my life, second only to my marriage vows. 

In response, Judge Kennedy, moved to tears, declared us to be "of high and good moral character." Now that character must carry through for a lifetime.

Watch our emotional oath read in this shaky courtroom video

9 Comments
linda
7/3/2015 07:56:39 am

I can say I'm thankful to your family for protecting those beautiful children. I "need " to say I was their paternal grandmother, unfortunately I was not in good enough health to take custody of my grandchildren, which day after day My heart aches with the fact that I will never see them or give them hugs. I also will "Never "forget them. Feel free to comment back. Thanks again :'(

Reply
MARILYNN
10/28/2018 02:14:41 pm

Linda you ARE their grandmother and if these people are keeping you from seeing them loving them and being in their life in a productive way that is horribly unfair to your grandchildren! One day you will hold them and they will return to your family! God does not like families to separate and anyone who wants to separate family does not have good intentions. If these people love your grandchildren they'll let you be part of their life Grandma!

Reply
Sue
7/4/2015 10:34:33 pm

How beautiful! Congratulations

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Paige Thornburg
7/5/2015 09:20:27 pm

I was also moved to tears. I see everyday the hurt of our children. (I am a teacher) I was so blessed by your words to know there are still people like your family in the world! Thank you and congratulations!

Reply
Paul Penley
7/9/2015 05:49:29 am

We see the same hurt. We wish there was a quick, easy solution to help every poorly parented child. But since it takes a lifetime of engaged parents with love, wisdom, and character to shape the healthy identity of children, there are no short cuts. Keep up your compassionate engagement as a teacher!

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Regina
7/8/2015 04:04:10 pm

This is a beautiful oath! Thank you for sharing this with us! Congratulations to your family!

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JPColleen
7/9/2015 05:15:53 am

I am really really excited and happy for your whole family. This is beautiful. Thank you Paul and Christie for being there for them.

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Xan Hood
7/14/2015 11:13:45 pm

Thanks for sharing this video and vulnerability, Paul. Moved by your courage and willingness to embrace a larger family and may God supply all their needs.

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Steve Marken
7/14/2015 11:24:04 pm

Paul and Christie,

Thank you for your wonderful example of being a light in this world and stepping forward in faith to give these beautiful children who have been created in His image a family and loving place to call home. I pray for His abundant blessing for all.

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